14 Tips to Take Your Sex Life to the Next Level
Looking to spice things up? This guide offers practical advice on how to have better sex through communication, physical affection, and addressing underlying issues.

Sex in modern culture often gets trivialized, scandalized, and in extreme cases, even vilified. But the reality is that sex is just like any other bodily function or biological need: it’s natural, serves a practical purpose, and can be integral to overall human health.
You don’t have to take our word for it either. There is plenty of good research that indicates that a healthy sex life is important for physical and psychological health.
Researchers at the OHSU have named, “lower blood pressure, immune health, heart health, self-esteem, decreased depression/anxiety, better sleep, and pain relief” as just some of the benefits of a healthy sex life.
On the other hand, a poor sex life may cause you to miss out on these important health benefits. So how do you have better sex?
In the following article we will be providing some sex tips for people who not only want to have more fulfilling sex; but live healthier lives as well.
Prioritize Open Communication
The first step towards having the best sex of your life is being open and upfront about your sexual desires. Encourage an open dialogue with your partner about ways of expressing your desires and establish boundaries to keep you both comfortable.
You can also establish regular sexual check-ins to ensure mutual satisfaction and that your sexual activities are still engaging for all parties involved.
Open and honest communication is key to great sex, It builds trust and allows partners to express desires and needs, leading to greater satisfaction- says Dr. Laura Berman a sex therapist.
Discussing sexual desires may be a bit embarrassing at first but it is completely natural and once you establish a discourse about your sexual appetite, you will find it much easier to express desires and see an instant improvement in sexual fulfillment.
During our research, we came across a YouTube video by a channel called Lanz MacDonald that we believe will be incredibly helpful.
Explore New Forms of Foreplay
Foreplay is very important for satisfying sex. It creates a build-up of sexual desire that keeps you and your partner mentally and physically engaged.
Try oral sex, heavy petting, kissing on the neck, ears, and other areas where you can clearly detect sexual stimulation.
Practice Mindfulness During Intimacy
Being present in the moment during sex can increase its intensity and satisfaction. Try not to be distracted while having sex and practice deep breathing to help you stay focused.
The National Institutes of Health have stated that,
More sexually mindful individuals tended to have better self-esteem, be more satisfied with their relationships and, particularly for women, be more satisfied with their sex lives. Some of these associations occurred even after controlling for trait mindfulness.
Maintain Physical Affection Outside the Bedroom
Emotional intimacy is important for any kind of satisfying sex. That’s why it’s good to practice affection both in and outside the bedroom.
Don’t be afraid to hold hands in public and don’t underestimate the sexual charge of a cute little peck on the cheek or a close cuddle on the couch.
Address Stress and Fatigue
Stress is the enemy of good sex. Excessive stress can affect your sexual performance and, according to leading medical authorities, can even lead to sexual dysfunction and diminished libido.
So it’s important to be open and communicative with your partner if you are feeling a lot of external pressure or stress. You can also try to reduce your stress with practices like meditation, yoga, exercise, and deep breathing.
Experiment with Different Positions
Trying new positions to find something that feels better than the usual can open the door to a new world of sexual excitement and satisfaction.
Again, be open and communicative with your partner about what positions work well and which ones aren’t your cup of tea.
Incorporate Erotic Massage
A sensual massage could be just what you need to pique sexual anticipation. Try an oiled massage and concentrate on erogenous zones like the neck, thighs, buttocks, legs, and shoulders.
Enhance the overall mood with dim, romantic lighting and you can also experiment with seductive music.
Use Lubrication to Enhance Comfort
Did you know that vaginal dryness affects an estimated 17% of women? It’s a problem that is rarely openly discussed because of the stigma around it but the fact is that it can make sexual intercourse painful and unpleasurable for many women and men.
That’s why intimate lubrication products can be a game-changer for you and your partner.
Schedule Intimate Time
Some of the best sex advice is the simplest. Many couples these days are simply too busy to make time for meaningful, mindful, and satisfying sex.
If you are barely squeezing in quickies with your partner, chances are the sex isn’t very good. Instead, try setting aside an hour or two every week in which to be truly intimate with your partner.
Scheduling intimacy like having sex in the morning, may allow you to dedicate adequate time for fulfilling sexual activity and give you and your partner something to look forward to every week.
Focus on Emotional Connection
Emotional intimacy and connection are imperative for better sex. It allows for a deeper connection that you can really feel manifest via more intense and arousing sexual encounters.
You can try to enhance your emotional connection with your partner by engaging in active listening, expressing appreciation for one another, telling personal stories, and simply checking in emotionally with your partner more often.
Explore Tantric Practices
For those wondering how to have good sex, tantric practices can be helpful. Tantric sex involves coming close to climax several times but withholding to prolong sexual activity - making it more intimate and intense. Slow intentional touching and breathing can help you last longer in bed as well.
Be Open to Role-Playing
Role-playing is a great way to explore sexual fantasies and have better sex overall.
Remember that your mind is your largest sexual organ so keep an open mind about fantasies that you and your partner may want to play out (safely) in the bedroom.
Maintain a Healthy Lifestyle
Good sex starts with good physical fitness. So it’s important to maintain your cardiovascular health to help you perform in bed and get more pleasure out of sex.
Regular exercise, a balanced diet, and adequate sleep will go a long way towards keeping you physically fit and desirable to your partner and making sure that you are up to the task when the mood strikes.

While a healthy lifestyle is fundamental, some men facing specific challenges might look into best male enhancement pills, though these should be approached with caution and medical guidance.
Seek Professional Guidance When Needed
Even the best of us need a little professional help sometimes. If nothing seems to be working for you and your partner, be open to intimacy/sexual counseling.
Therapy may help draw out underlying sexual issues that may be affecting you in and outside the bedroom. Plus, it’s a great way to establish open communication about your sex life with your partner while a neutral 3rd party is present to maintain objectivity.
The American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists have a great directory for such professional therapy resources.
Conclusion
If you were paying close attention to our list, you will notice that some of the tips can also be applied to other areas of your life. Like many things, sexual health depends on keeping yourself generally healthy in other ways.
That’s why healthy sex can depend on regular exercise, good sleep, proper diet, open communication, and stress-reduction: all things that can also greatly benefit other areas of your health and life.
We encourage you to try the tips listed above because a healthy sex life can work wonders for your physical and mental wellbeing.
FAQs
References
- The Benefits of a Healthy Sex Life: https://www.ohsu.edu/womens-health/benefits-healthy-sex-life
- The role of sexual mindfulness in sexual wellbeing, Relational wellbeing, and self-esteem: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC6640099/
- How Stress Impacts Your Sexual Health and Ways to Manage It: https://myallyhealth.org/about/blog/how-stress-impacts-your-sexual-health-way-to-manage-it/
- Vaginal Dryness: https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/symptoms/21027-vaginal-dryness
- What is Active Listening?: https://hbr.org/2024/01/what-is-active-listening
- Referral Directory: https://www.aasect.org/referral-directory